Life

The Cobra is up and running! I did a fair amount of driving today, and no problems whatsoever! I warned everyone religiously to beware the side pipes, for they burn badly. Well, waddya know, someone got it. Me. Calf: Big Burn.

The car gets quite a bit of attention. A little girl started jumping and screaming when she saw me coming, and her mum followed with two thumbs up. A kid jumped off his bike and played dead in the middle of the road, wanting a ride.

It's a wierd letdown of a high, getting the car running. Driving the car is great. However, it's a wierd realization that I spent hundreds, hundreds of hours building an object that fits is a 6X12 box.

College:

Summer is a time to get refreshed. It's a time to roll my "school ball" to the top of the hill so I can roll back down. My school ball got really heavy. It didn't make it up the hill.

I'm also having severe doubts about being an engineer. Fact: I could be an amazing engineer. Fact: Engineering is not my dream.

What's been my dream my entire life? Flying. I'm gonna check out Rocky Mountain College's Aviation program that comes with it's very own Liberal Arts degree.

Fact is, I have no clue what I really want to do for a living. I am happier than ever with life, but I'm freaking over the "life details."

I'm seeing that to be happy and awesome I do not have to:

risk my life witnessing to tribes in South America
be the best mountain biker this side of Saudi Arabia
be a missionary
be a preacher
be absolutely everyone's friend
keep absolutely everyone happy
care about things not worth caring
be a stunt pilot
be an adrenaline junkie
break my collar bone a second time
do the world's sickest whip of all time on a motorcycle
land an esteemed, high paying job.

I want to enjoy life now, not attack it. Life isn't earning a PhD, making money, or nabbing the hottest lady in the bar. People drive their way through life, thinking that success and power is their dream. Pull back the throttle and love something.

I remember being a kid, loving with everything. My dog, legos, blowing stuff up, birthdays, the time of day school got out, my bike. Remember how that felt? Wasn't it awesome, that huge chestfull of excitement? If you could fall in love with Life like a little kid with his dog...forever, wouldn't you want to?

I look at my Mom. She gets waken up sometimes at 4:30 by her own excitement to go garden. She gets tens of phone calls from friends saying "hi" every day. She smiles for no good reason. I joke that if she got thrown in jail, she would wake up early to polish her fake plant before she started singing to her cell mates. She definitely loves life.

There's another thing she's crazy about: God. She depends on God as if her life depends on it. She is ecstatic for God, and has been since she was 16. How many things can you be rediculously excited about for almost 40 years? She definitely loves God.

I see that my Mom loves life. She loves God. And I am now seeing that there is a connection. And I'm learning through trial and error that it is The connection.